Charlie Sheen, quote machine and erstwhile star of "Two and a Half Men," gave a live interview with TMZ.com from his backyard. Without the constraints of morning news interviews (and according to reports, his publicist) Sheen was free to ramble. And ramble he did.
"I'm crazy, I'm passionate and I speak the truth," Sheen told TMZ interviewer Mike Walters. The actor repeated claims he has made in recent interviews that he is exceptional.
"I have a grandiose life. I embrace it." Sheen said. "Sorry my life is so much more bitchin' than yours. I planned it this way."
Sure, Sheen has stumbled a bit in recent days - a suitcase filled with cocaine, a porn star cowering in a closet, and a mouth full of rotting teeth, if some of his accusers are to be believed.
But, according to Sheen, it's important to blame the right people - namely the ones lining his pockets with cash. "I say blame the studio," he said, "for giving me this much dough, knowing who they were giving it to."
Speaking of dough, Sheen is demanding quite a bit more of it in order to return to "Two and a Half Men." He told NBC on Monday morning he wanted a $1.2 million dollar per episode raise.
As for the show's creator, Chuck Lorre, Sheen had mixed reviews.
"I give him credit for creating something brilliant," he said at one point. But also commented, "I think he burned out before I did. I don't have burnout in my gearbox. I don't have it. I just have go."
Sheen also got a bit Sun Tzu during the interview.
"I'm insulted. I am confused," he said, "but these resentments they are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber. Want to go to war. Let's go to war."
That seems at odds with Sheen's idea of how to solve this dispute. "Let's get back on stage. We'll figure it out in a creative environment, not in a legal environment," he said.
In related news, Sheen's long-time publicist, Stan Rosenfield, quit. In a statement, Rosenfield said, "I'm unable to work effectively as his publicist and have respectfully resigned."
But who needs a publicist anyway? As Sheen says, "every plan I have is the best plan in the room."
CBS Entertainment had not commented by press time. CBS Entertainment and CBS News are owned by the same parent company.
Full interview on TMZ.